Cereal Killer
Count Chocula had been found dead the week before with a wooden stake through his heart, and now it was the Trix rabbit roasting on a skewer. Who would be next? Corporate execs from General Mills called for an emergency meeting.
"We've staked out the oceanfront villa of Tony the Tiger, and have him trailed by three operatives," their head of security boomed. "We're also working on Lucky the Leprechaun, but for some reason, he thinks his magic is going to pull him through. It's a little excessive we think."
Just then, Toucan Sam hit the board room window with a thud. A crazed bumblebee, foaming at the mouth, leered over him, a honey-stick in his hands like a battle-hammer.
"Cheeri-o!" he squealed, and as soon as he'd greeted us, he was gone. "Ta-Ta!!" The sweet smell lingered in the air, making me slightly sick. I couldn't tell if it was bee leavings, or the residue from Sam's rainbow beak, now integrated with the window pane.
"Honey," the president said to his secretary - that was her real name - "I think I'm going nuts."
"Yes, sir," she replied, "of course. I'll order a bowl to put you in."
The phone rang.
"Sir, its Snap, Crackle and Pop calling for you. Should I put them in milk for you?"
Lucky overheard her from the waiting room. "Don't bring them in, or I'll quit. They're always after me--"
Someone closed the board room door just then.
"Well, no, last time we did that they got so soggy they couldn't work for a month. Completely threw off our ad campaign."
A breathless guard rushed in. "I think soggy might be what you want, sir. You better come take a look at this! He led the board members to a table where photos lay - photos with Snap - snapped in two! Police chalk surrounded his broken form.
"Did somebody say soggy?" a voice called from the waiting room.
"Aye, cap'n, it seems somebody's truncated an elf, and a busy bee's been bashing birds. It wouldn't be so bad if he was slicing that stupid bird Sonny over at Kellogg's," commented the chariman.
