I'm Too White and Nerdy

(Pre-titled by Alan)

As I sat at the computer and fired up my motherboard, I couldn't help think ing that I shouldn't be rebooting so early in the morning . Confetti, like dandruff, fell off my floppy, so I shook it clean and swigged coffee like it was black-eyed peas. Black-eyed peas floated in a crusty external disk drive that I used for a bowl. I hadn't seen my fatherboard since the divorce but my adopted fish was a comfort. She swam as a screensaver. Pixel, I named her. She needed a mate, but I needed one, too, and didn't that seem fitting? We had each been only children, so we never knew our siblings. Sad ness crept over us, but I tickled her with my mouse, she flicked her tail in joy, and we nuzzled through the glass.